penultimate – Women & Children Last

National Penultimnate Day

(Special to Women & Children Last from the Daily Lack of News)

Our culture is obsessed with going the extra mile, giving 110 percent, leaving it all on the field. Supermarkets are open 24/7/365 to satisfy our shopping needs from A-to-Z, while athletes routinely crow about taking their games “to a whole ‘nother level.” In the midst of this maelstrom, like the voice of one hand clapping in the wilderness, stands Phil Maggitti, founder and HMFIC of National Penultimate Day℠.

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Definitions

penultimate, adj.

Penultimate, as civilized people learn in school, means “the next to last.”

Penultimate does not mean nor should it be allowed to mean “the most ultimate” or “the most awesome.”

The misuse of penultimate leads to atrocities like this headline from Science Direct, “Female genital mutilation: the penultimate gender abuse.”